Cardboard Cutouts
by Spirit Summoner
Summary: It’s night. It’s late. And Jaden is in Chazz’s room. But it’s not what you might think. Or maybe it is. I guess it all depends on whether Chazz is really hallucinating or not…


**Cardboard Cut-outs**

Jaden stared at the face in front of him.

It was a moment frozen forever in time; the picture had been taken shortly after his victory over Chazz in the 'School Duel' in one of his typical after-victory poses. Not the 'that's game' one, but the one reserved for when he had fought a particularly difficult duel that he had found particularly enjoyable. It was the one where he laughed with his head back and arm twisted behind his neck in a pose that suggested an almost sheepish giddiness.

Jaden knew that it would have had to have been done that day. Why? Well, because he had only won that duel a few hours earlier.

But anyway, the picture had been taken and for some reason had been blown up to life-size proportions and was currently propped up against the wall.

Completely normal, you would think.

Well, it would have been if it had been in his room, or anywhere in his dorm. In fact, it would have been perfectly normal anyplace – an aquarium, the zoo, outer space – anyplace at all, other than where it actually was.

Chazz's room.

_Chazz's_ room.

The room belonging to _the_ Chazz.

_Okay Jaden, it doesn't matter how many times, or different ways you say it, it's still here._

He squinted at it. Surely there had to be something wrong with it. Maybe Chazz had defaced it – painted Crowler's lipstick on him or given him a dodgy 'tache or something –

_Nope…_

He let out a breath of air.

_This is so weird_, he told himself mentally. _Why does Chazz have this in his room? Heck, why does he even have this?_

"I mean, if it was anybody else, then maybe – like Alexis or even Zane, but me? This really is too weird!" he repeated out loud, as though that would make it any less strange.

"_Coo, coo, coo!"_

"Oh! Hey Winged Kuriboh – what's up?" Jaden smiled fondly at his duel spirit as it hovered by his shoulder. "What? Chazz is coming? Umm…okay, whatever I do I can't panic. There is absolutely no need to panic. Just. Don't. Panic."

He panicked.

And then he started hyperventilating.

_What is Chazz doing coming back so early anyway?_

Kuriboh 'cooed.' He glanced at the clock. It was gone midnight and way past Duel Academy curfew.

_Well I was already in his room anyway!_ he waved at the model of himself as an illustration of that fact, but he really didn't think that that would go down well if he chose to use it to explain why he was there.

_Maybe if I get behind it and stand really, really still and try not to breathe then Chazz won't notice and I can just sneak out when he falls asleep._

"_Coo, coo-coo!"_

"Dammit Kuriboh! I know it was a stupid plan, but I don't hear you coming up with anything better," he retorted.

Panic levels were rocketing to hysteria as Jaden flapped around the room trying to find somewhere to hide.

_The bathroom – no, he'll probably have to go in to wash out all that gel that he uses to get it like that. I wonder how much he uses. It must be a lot, but it smells good so –_

Jaden's – ahem – planning was interrupted by the sound of –

_Footsteps! I am so screwed! Okay, just don't panic!_

He was still panicking.

_The wardrobe – no, everyone knows never to hide in the wardrobe. What about the curtains?_

He noticed the doorjamb jiggle out of the corner of his eye and start to turn…

It was turning to the Blair in Zane's room fiasco all over again.

_Only Blair was 'in love' with Zane. Oh, no! What if Chazz sees me and thinks I have a crush on him or something!_

Jaden blushed.

Winged Kuriboh blew a raspberry at him but he had no time to deal with the flying spirit. Instead, he let his instinct to survive take over and threw himself under the bed, careful to rearrange the duvet so that it looked like it had never been touched.

As far as anyone knew, it had never been touched.

Jaden was not there.

Only, he was.

_Damn_.

Chazz walked in as he normally did, not realising that anything was amiss. He didn't bother flipping the main light switch – he preferred it dark and his eyes were quite accustomed to it anyway.

Or so Jaden hoped.

The truth was, Chazz walked in with a slight sway. He paused to steady himself and placed something on the bedside table whilst turning on the lamp.

And then he stopped just in front of the bed.

_Please, God, if you're up there, don't let him find me here. Please!_ Jaden prayed silently under the bed, and then said the same to whatever other deities he could think of, even solicited the Three Egyptian God Card monsters twice each.

"You still here?" Chazz asked bluntly.

Jaden's heart stopped.

_Oh, crap…he knows I'm here. He's knows I'm here. I'm so dead. No, I'm deader than dead. Maybe if I'm lucky there'll be enough of me left to identity…_

Chazz glared at the face in front of him.

"You have a big mouth," he said.

_He so totally knows I'm here…_

Jaden cringed.

"I mean, it's not even big in a good way, because some big mouths are really hot and just make you wanna kiss them –"

It was then Jaden realised that he was slurring his words slightly.

"But if anyone tried to kiss you they'd probably be swallowed by that monster mouth of yours," Chazz sneered.

Jaden knew that Chazz was probably drunk and didn't really have a clue what he was saying, but he had to admit, he did feel a little hurt. And a bit uneasy about the fact that Chazz was talking about other people kissing him.

_Is that all you think of me?_ he wondered. _Am I just a big mouth to you?_

"And you eat too much," he continued. "I know you're wondering how I know – I've seen you. You're always hungry. You probably eat more than Chumley. Oh, and by the way Jaden, you have something in your teeth."

_I had something in my teeth for the entire duel and no one thought to tell me?_

Chazz continued to stare at the cardboard cut-out.

_Damn you, Jaden!_

Chazz folded his arms over his chest as he scrutinised the cardboard cut-out of his rival; his nemesis.

Jaden looked so, so _him_. It was the only way to describe it. The cut-out was of a person who was totally at one with himself – he was so innocent, pleased but without pride or arrogance.

_So happy._

It was a painful reminder to Chazz, in that it should have been him and it was what he wanted.

It was never easy losing, but he hadn't lost for so long before he met Jaden that he felt himself losing a bit of himself with every failure. It was hard to accept that someone like Jaden – so reckless and wild could defeat him, Chazz Princeton who had aspired for so long to be the top student at the Duellist Academy and eventually, the next King of Game.

_Actually, I never wanted any of this…_

It was true. Ever since he was a child he had been forced into the world of duelling. Well, when he thought about it he supposed that his brothers probably read different strategies to him when he was still in the womb.

_It's not that I don't like duelling, I mean, I love it, but they make me want to stop, to end it all. It's like in the last duel with Jaden. They wanted me to win so badly that they bought as many rare and powerful cards as possible. _

"I didn't even want them! I don't want anything they have!" he flung his arms wide, casting them aside, but he lost his balance and stumbled a little.

_I don't have anything they have_, he thought as he caught himself_. They've disowned me. _

Jaden listened silently to Chazz's outbursts, careful to keep his breathing as quiet as he could. But then Kuriboh pointed at something and Jaden shifted forward slightly and lifted the hem of the duvet.

"I see him," he whispered back.

"_Err, boss?" _Ojama Yellow asked with some concern.

Chazz ignored him.

"_Don't you think you should just lie down? You did drunk a lot, boss. Boss? Why don't you just get some sleep, Boss?"_

"Well if it bothers you so much why don't you just leave me alone?" Chazz demanded, batting the small duel spirit away. "I don't need you to baby-sit me. I don't need anyone. I can take care of myself!" he replied angrily.

He went over to the window, tore open the curtains and threw open the glass panes.

"Do you hear that brothers?" he shouted. "Do you hear me? I don't need either of you or your money. Chazz Princeton doesn't need anyone but himself so stay the Hell out of my life!"

_Poor Chazz…_

"_Aww…boss…"_

"Shut up! I don't need your pity. I don't need anything from anyone. Not you. Not my brothers and definitely nothing from Jaden!" he sneered, spitting out the name with poisonous venom that made Jaden cringe.

He stormed angrily into his bathroom and slammed the door behind him. There was the sound of enraged fists on the door, a hot expulsion of air and then the crash of running water.

Ojama Yellow floated dejectedly to the floor, feeling as useless as ever whenever Chazz was like this, and even when Chazz wasn't.

"Kuriboh? No – don't!"

But it was too late and the winged monster flew out to meet the other spirit.

"_Eek! Help! Chazz!"_

"Shh!" Jaden burst out from under the bed, hoping to silence the other duel spirit, but he only cried out louder.

"_I'm being attacked – save me!"_

Luckily, the loudness of the water and the fact that Chazz often chose to ignore the 'thing' when possible, he didn't come running out with a flame thrower.

"I can't let Chazz know I'm here," Jaden explained.

"_Hey! You're him!" _Ojama pointed to the cardboard cut-out.

Jaden nodded.

"_In that case you have to help me."_

"Help you?"

"_With Chazz."_

"With Chazz?" Jaden repeated dumbly. "Err, I don't know if you know this or not, but Chazz isn't exactly my biggest fan."

Suddenly, from the bathroom came a prolonged cry that was a mix of fury and anguish.

"_He's not always like this, well actually, a lot of the time he is, but not this bad. He drank something. Whenever he drinks that stuff he gets worse and scary and violent and I'm worried he might do something stupid, but he won't listen to me."_

Jaden glanced at the night stand and saw that it was a worryingly empty bottle of what was vodka. Even more worryingly, Jaden could no longer hear the shower.

He cursed.

"Kuriboh – we have to get back under the bed," he ordered. He had already scrambled by the time Kuriboh appeared.

Chazz laughed darkly in the bathroom, surprising Jaden which made him jump.

Of course, since he was under the bed he hit his head and swore.

_That's so gonna leave a mark_, he thought as he rubbed the sore spot.

Chazz was still laughing manically as he exited the bathroom.

"_Boss are you okay?"_ Ojama Yellow was more than worried now.

"Oh I'm better than just 'okay,'" he explained.

In his arms he had several items that Ojama Yellow had never seen before and some that he had. And a bottle.

"_What are those?"_

"You'll see," he answered enigmatically. He placed them on his desk and switched on the desk lamp. "You're in for a treat, tonight. I'm glad they didn't think to clear out my stuff. They would have expelled me; no questions asked if they found this stuff."

_And probably put me in rehab or something stupid. Not that that would stop me._

"Nothing can stop the Chazz!" he cried out suddenly.

Jaden peered out from underneath the bed curiously.

_Just don't do anything stupid Chazz…_

Chazz pulled out the chair and seated himself.

"You see this?" he took hold of a tall curved glass.

It looked like an hourglass, but was twisted in the middle and the top was open. The circle was rimmed with silver metal which was split in two by raised crescents that lay directly opposite each other.

"What you do is take this and this," he placed the glass directly in front of himself and then reached for a strange metal object.

It looked very similar to a spoon, but the handle was much more ornate. The metal had been forged to look like liquid, twisting and swirling and if you looked closely enough, you could make out the outline of a woman. The head of the spoon was longer than most, and strangely, there were a number of thin slits cut into it and it was pointed at the tip and slightly more slender.

"And put that just here."

Chazz rested the spoon so that the head was directly over the open centre of the glass, so that the bit nearest the tip and the neck of the handle respectively were held by the metal crescents.

"Now's when the good stuff starts," he informed Ojama Yellow.

Jaden felt the skin on the back of his neck prickle with a cold sweat. He knew that Chazz acted a bit odd at times, but he never expected something like this. Not that he knew what was going on yet, but he had a feeling that the 'good stuff' was most likely something bad.

_Very bad._

Chazz popped the lid off a small cylindrical tin. It was half full of sugar cubes, which kind of begged the question; 'what had happened to the other half?' He took one of the crystallised cubes and carefully placed it onto the spoon.

"And now, the secret ingredient," he said forebodingly.

He snatched up the bottle, the light from the lamp reflecting off the luminous green of both the glass and the liquid itself. There were no obvious markings to say what the bottle held, the label obviously having been removed to this end. The bottle was bunged with a large cork, through which was a thin rod of metal. With the bottle in his right hand, Chazz placed his left hand on the top. The cork was positioned between his first and second fingers, and the rest were wrapped over the metal bar for maximum grip.

"This," he began as he twisted with a mighty effort. He hadn't opened this in a long time. Up until now he hadn't needed to. "This is 'absinthe,'" he explained to Ojama Yellow, although it was really to dull the silence. "Not the crap that you buy today though. No, this is vintage stuff, straight outta the Belle Époque. I bought it when we were over in France that time."

The cork finally gave way and wisps of green smoke emerged from the opening of the bottle. With a cackle, Chazz poured a liberal amount over the cube and watched intently as it soaked in, turning the white crystals an eerie green as it spilled through the cuts in the spoon into the absinthe glass until it was roughly two thirds full.

He picked up the final item that he had brought in from the bathroom. It was small and metal, easily fitting into the palm of his hand. It was a lighter in the shape of a dragon. He placed his thumb on the back of its head and pressed down.

Nothing.

He did it again, harder, faster, cursing it under his breath, but this time it worked and a small orange flame emerged from its mouth.

"This is the way you're supposed to drink it. It was like a ritual. The 'Absinthe Ritual,'" he snorted. "If you were lucky, then you would summon up the 'Green Fairy' – but I guess I'll have to settle for a little yellow bugger, huh?"

"_Chazz I don't think you should do this,"_ Ojama Yellow told him cautiously.

"Why don't you people ever let me do what I want?" Chazz demanded. He smirked. "Oh well, I'll just have to find a way to get rid of you then, won't I?"

"_Get rid of me?"_

Chazz put the lighter down and went back into the bathroom and emerged with his trench. He was rooting around in one of the pockets when he found what he wanted.

"_Why do you have your deck, Boss? Boss?"_

Again he was ignored. Chazz systematically sorted through his cards until he had it.

Ojama Yellow's Duel Monster card.

He picked up the lighter and flicked the head of the dragon. This time it sparked instantly. With cold cruelty, Chazz placed the card directly in the flame and watched as it slowly began to burn its way across the card from the bottom corner, along the edge and up the side.

"_Boss, Boss that hurts!" _Ojama Yellow flapped about in pain before it all became too much and he vanished.

His master laughed evilly and tossed aside the card, never releasing the catch on the lighter.

The card landed just in front of Jaden who gingerly reached out, covering the card with his whole hand to stop the fire from spreading. As a result the card was still fairly singed, but not destroyed.

_How could you do that to your own card?_

Chazz brought the flame closer to his construction and watched as the alcohol caught fire, setting the sugar cube alight in a blaze of green. The embers fell through the holes in the spoon and the absinthe exploded in a cloud of green smoke and flame that shot up out of the glass.

Chazz was caught off guard and fell backwards, tipping the chair over and landing on the floor. He laughed like a madman as he clambered back to the desk on his hands and knees. He didn't even bother picking up the chair.

"I never know what to do now. I must have stopped listening to the guy who told me how you were supposed to drink it," he admitted, forgetting that he had ridden himself of the burden that he thought Ojama Yellow was to him. "I wasn't all that bothered after he told me that absinthe was so dangerous it was banned in 1915."

Jaden was filled with a sense of dread.

_Don't do it, Chazz…_

Jaden really wanted to stop him, but he knew that Chazz wouldn't have listened even if he had tried.

But it didn't make him any less worried.

Chazz waited for the fire to die down and took hold of the spoon which now held a melted and misshapen sugar cube; the other hand was used to seize the body of the glass. With evidently practiced ease Chazz slid the cube into his mouth and immediately followed it with the absinthe which he downed in one. It was still hot and burnt his mouth and throat, but he didn't care.

He never cared about anything after a few glasses.

But that was mainly because he'd be so out of it, he really had no idea what was going on.

* * *

Three more enthusiastic absinthe rituals later and Chazz was really slurring his words.

Jaden was actually quite impressed at the amount he had managed to consume without throwing up. He concluded that Chazz was probably a very seasoned drinker, which he didn't think was good at all.

That's when it happened.

It started with the shaking. Chazz's whole body was trembling. Whether it was from the fact that he hadn't bothered to dry himself after his shower, or the amount of sugar and alcohol in his bloodstream, Jaden couldn't tell.

And then the hallucinations started.

Jaden barely noticed at first. He thought that perhaps Chazz spoke to himself a lot; he had seen him do it enough times. But it wasn't the same as talking to himself. It was as though Chazz thought there were actually other people there.

Which there was, but he didn't actually know that.

"I thought I told you to get lost!" he shouted at thin air, punching at nothing. "Take a hike and take your money and plans with you. I don't want any part of any of them!" he waved his arms about frantically.

He stopped. It was like he was waiting for someone to say something back. Maybe in his mind they were.

"Why? You never even cared about me! It's always been about you – you, you, you! Do you even care what I want? What do I want? I want – what I really want is – what I want – all I really want is for you to care. About me. Someone – anyone – just so long as they care – I want you all to care. All I want is for someone to care about me!" he sobbed. "I don't want to be worthless anymore."

And then they changed. _Chazz_ changed.

"I don't want you to do that to me anymore! Stop – don't – I – I – please, stop. You're hurting me!"

He curled into a ball at the centre of the room, arms over his head, eyes darting about madly.

"No – no, please. Please, I'll get it next time, I promise. I won't lose next time, just don't hit me. Don't hit me again!" he cried out, his face contorting in pain with every imagined blow. "I'll do anything you want me to, just stop hurting me! Please, I'll get stronger and I won't let you down I swear, just please stop. Please!"

Jaden bit his lip. It was horrible seeing Chazz like this.

_It was like when he wigged out in the bathroom!_ Jaden realised.

He had no idea the level of torment Chazz's brothers had put him through. He was furious with them. The next time he saw them they were going down. He couldn't believe that they would actually hit their own brother. And not only that, but the mental torture, the mind games. They were sick.

Then, Chazz rolled onto his back and began to laugh hysterically.

"I can see you," he sing-songed. "I know you're there. Come out, come out wherever you are!"

Jaden gulped.

Chazz laughed like a child as he continued and then began pointing at the ceiling and naming all the different Duel Monsters he could see. He attempted to sit up, but clutched his stomach and lat back down.

"Whoa! If I get up too fast, I'll fly away!" he giggled. "I'll fly away like a little birdie and be free to do what I want!"

Jaden sighed in relief, but felt very scared for Chazz. This couldn't be good.

And then he changed again.

Chazz got up and ran the length of the room punching at nothing, before his eyes locked onto the cut-out of Jaden.

"And you!" he pointed at him accusingly. "You can go with them and take all your 'you have to duel for the love of the game' with you. It may be fun for you, but I bet you've never had anyone to let down. You've never had the pressure to succeed forcing you to duel."

He was standing right in front of the picture now, his fists clenched by his sides.

"You've never had anyone to let down," he repeated, louder this time. "You didn't have a whole family to disappoint. I was made a laughing stock when you defeated me. I was supposed to win, bit I lost – it doesn't matter what you say. When it comes down to it, only the person in first place matters. Nobody cares about number two. I'm a loser – and it's all your fault!" Chazz shot out a hand and punched the cardboard Jaden square in the face.

_Ouch…I'm glad that's not actually me. _Jaden's face crumpled when he heard the sound of bone crunching against the stone wall behind the cardboard.

"I hate you Jaden Yuki!" he screamed as he landed another blow, and then another and another. "I hate you for taking away everything I had and becoming everything I was meant to be!"

And he struck out again and again and again, each hit bending and creasing the cardboard until he finally broke through. But still he didn't stop, just kept on pounding and pummelling until the skin on his knuckles broke and his blood was smeared over Jaden's smile.

"Oh, you like that do you?" he accused threateningly. "Do you have any idea what that is? Do you?"

_Chazz…_

"That's my blood you bastard! You did this to me – you killed me, Jaden Yuki. You killed Chazz Princeton and this is all that's left!"

He bit into his skin, ripping it open so that more blood trickled out and began to spread it all over the cardboard cut-out.

"Here, have more – have it all. That's what you want, isn't it? Everything I have? Well, then take it. Take it!" he screeched. "What? Is it not enough? Not enough?" he grabbed the cut-out by the shoulder, gripping so tightly that the tendons turned white with the exertion as he dragged his hand along the crisp edge.

He let go and stared at his hand, scored by two fine lines running parallel to one over the centre of his palm. The cuts were deep and blood seeped through the gashes.

"What about now?" he demanded, slapping his hands onto the face again. "Is it enough now? It's never enough for you is it?" red stained the head of the cardboard image, but he didn't stop. "I'm giving you everything I have – I've always given you my all – but it's never good enough for you! It's never fucking good enough!"

It was awful. Jaden had never seen Chazz – or anyone for that matter - so fragile and yet so, so terrifyingly dangerous.

But Jaden couldn't just watch anymore. He didn't care about the consequences; he cared about Chazz.

Maybe he cared too much.

"Chazz – _stop_!" he called out as he crawled out from under the bed and seized him by the waist, pulling him backwards.

He didn't even care that he was only wearing a short towel around his waist and water droplets were still dotted over his pale skin, or how close he was to the other man's body.

Well, actually he did care. A lot. But he tried not to think about it. Too much.

"What the – Jaden?" Chazz blinked in obvious shock. "But you're there," he looked at the cut-out that he had pinned against the wall. "You can't be there as well!" he shouted like a petulant child in a strop.

And then he laughed in that way that froze Jaden's blood.

"Oh I get it. This must be a hallucination, right?"

_He's in a worse state than I thought._

"Chazz…" Jaden tried to yank him away from the cardboard cut-out of himself. It was more than a little unnerving to think of the damage that Chazz would have done if that was really him. Especially since he wouldn't have done anything to stop him.

"You know they say that Van Gogh lost his mind to absinthe poisoning," Chazz said it in a way that made it sound like he didn't believe it. He turned to face the actual Jaden "You don't think I'm crazy do you?"

"Chazz you have to stop," Jaden told him, still not letting go.

"You think I'm crazy, don't you?" he demanded, pushing Jaden off him. He landed with a 'thud' on his rear.

"Chazz please…"

"I'm not crazy," he stated firmly.

It was only then that Jaden realised the insanity of it all. Chazz stood above him, his dark eyes clouded in rage, the whites bloodshot. And his hair was still as wild and spiky as ever, despite still being damp.

_Maybe he doesn't use as much gel as I thought_, Jaden mused. _What am I thinking about that for! Maybe it's me that's hallucinating. Maybe this is all just a dream._ He pinched himself. _Damnit, no, not a dream._

"I don't think you're crazy," Jaden told him, hoping that it would calm him down at least a little. "I just think you're a guy who was forced to grow up way too fast and was hurt a lot in the process."

Chazz laughed that malicious way again, placing his bloodied hand on his temples, splashing his face with the sticky claret.

"Are you pitying me?" he asked in disbelief. "You – a nobody, pitying me? Chazz Princeton?" he leant in close, his face mere millimetres away from Jaden. "I don't want your pity," he informed him.

"Well that's a good thing, because I'm not giving it to you," Jaden answered cheekily.

_Oh no! Why'd I have to go and say that?_

Chazz's expression darkened instantly.

"You dare mock me?" he roared. "You don't know anything about me!"

Chazz snatched him up by the collar of his red blazer and jerked him upright.

"Do you even know what you've done to me, Jaden?" Chazz demanded.

He had that dangerous look in his eyes. Jaden felt beads of sweat drip down the sides of his face.

"You've taken everything."

Chazz took a step forward, forcing Jaden to take one back. And then he took another, and one more and Jaden felt the bed strike the back of his knees.

"All I did was play the game," he whimpered.

"This isn't a game for me, Jaden! This is my life!"

Jaden fell back onto the bed and Chazz, who still had hold of his collar, toppled over on top of him.

"My own family disowned me because of you!" he shifted himself until he was directly above Jaden, pinning him to the bed. He placed his bleeding hand on Jaden's face, forcing him to look up at him. "How does it feel to stare into the face of the man whose life you destroyed?"

The warm liquid made it easy for Chazz to sweep his hand over Jaden's soft face. He stopped when he reached Jaden's mouth and covered it.

_He's gonna suffocate me! _Jaden panicked and thrashed about under him, but Chazz was a lot heavier than you would have guessed, and strong as well.

"Taste it," Chazz ordered.

Jaden complied and flicked out his tongue to reluctantly taste the scarlet liquid.

_It's so bitter, just like Chazz's heart._

He licked again, realising that the blood was beginning to flow less. Despite not wanting to, Jaden was too scared to stop, and so continued lapping up the blood, cleaning off the palm of Chazz's hand.

"You've taken everything from me," Chazz told him again, lowering his face closer to Jaden's.

Jaden swallowed, but the painful lump in his throat didn't disappear.

"So now I'm going to take something from you."

Chazz slowly slid his hand away from Jaden's mouth, only to replace it with his own. Jaden's eyes widened in surprise, and he instinctively tried to close his mouth, only for it to be pried apart by Chazz's lips, allowing his insistent tongue entrance.

Jaden couldn't believe what was happening. His mind was screaming out for Chazz to stop.

_This is wrong, but then why – why do I want this?_

Jaden allowed Chazz complete dominance in the kiss. He was still too stunned and confused to do anything in return. Chazz pulled away and slapped him. Hard. Tears formed in Jaden's eyes.

"I want you to fight me, Jaden," he growled. "I want to defeat you. I want to show you what it feels like to lose – to lose in the worst possible way."

Jaden's heart was pounding against his chest.

_No…_

But he did. He tried to attack, to force the other away, to push Chazz out, but he couldn't. He didn't know what he was doing, he had no control. He felt completely overwhelmed.

Jaden closed his eyes, and a tear slid out from beneath the lid.

This wasn't what he wanted.

No.

_This isn't the way I wanted this._

He felt Chazz pulling at his blazer, tugging it away from his body and down his arms until he was no longer wearing it. His hands then slipped under his t-shirt. Chazz released him from the kiss, finally allowing Jaden some precious air, before he began assaulting his neck. By now Chazz's hands were working on the button of his pants.

"Chazz…" Jaden began breathlessly. "Stop."

He was ignored.

"Don't do this," he begged.

Chazz's hands seemed to slow, but his kisses didn't and he went for another go at Jaden's mouth.

"_Please_."

Chazz stared into Jaden's eyes. He was scared. No, more than just scared. Terrified.

Just like he was.

But unlike Chazz, Jaden wasn't angry, and that just infuriated him all the more.

Chazz began to lose himself in the glossy orbs, until he forgot that Jaden was underneath him. At that moment, he was staring at himself.

"Get out."

"What?" Jaden blinked.

"Get out. NOW!" Chazz screamed, practically hurling Jaden off the bed and out of the room. "I never want to see you again! I hate you!"

He then leapt off himself and went to the cardboard cut-out lying underneath the open window. He fell to his knees and began to cry, hot, angry tears.

"I hate you, Jaden Yuki! I hate you for taking away everything I ever wanted and being everything I want!"

Chazz knew that he was really as flat and as two dimensional as the object that he was crying over.

The real reason said that he hated Jaden was because it was so much easier to deal with hate than anything else. After all, if you hated what you really wanted, didn't that mean you didn't want him anyway?

_It._

_Not him._

Chazz Princeton couldn't afford to want anything or anyone, especially the guy in the cardboard cut-out.

Sometimes, it was better to be fake like that, because when you were, things didn't hurt as much and when you're a cardboard cut-out you didn't cry real tears or bleed real blood.

But Chazz wasn't a cardboard cut-out, and he couldn't pretend. He was doing both.


End file.
